Embracing Competitiveness: The Desire to Win in Youth Sports
Throughout our athlete development program, we frequently hear parents and coaches expressing concerns about their athletes being “too competitive”, “sore losers”, or “losing control of their emotions”. We understand the frustration, but rather than trying to change these traits, we embrace them and focus on teaching athletes how to manage them effectively. Being competitive and disliking losing are positive attributes, but losing control of one's emotions will lead to negative consequences, such as reduced performance, a lack of trust from teammates and coaches, and a diminishing love for the sport.To help athletes harness their true qualities, here are 3 strategies we use:1. Video Review:Review specific instances where athletes allowed their emotions to get the better of them. Ask questions like, "What were the consequences of your behavior?" and "What could you have done differently?" Encourage them to answer honestly without judgment, and without giving your opinion or answers. You want to guide them to reflect on their actions and their role in the situation. Any time they start to place blame or talk about anyone but themselves remind them you are only talking about them and their actions. Ultimately, we want them to perform in-the-moment self-evaluations.2. Establishing a Process:With athletes, creating a routine before, during, and after a game or match is essential to getting peak performance. Before competition they should have a set routine which could be listening to the same song, a specific warm up, a breathing routine, or even meals. This allows their brain to accept that they are about to go to battle and prepare mentally for it. During the game create anchors to refocus them on the task at hand. Everyone is the hero in their own story so when a situation goes badly, a ref/ump/judge makes a bad call, or a different player or teammate is involved, we as humans tend to blame others. Sometimes those things are true but how often does a ref change a call because the player pled their case? Not often. So why waste time and energy? An anchor word, phrase, or action will be used multiple times throughout a competition to recenter the athlete. This will only happen through practicing this method and reinforcing it in hands-on training.3. Adapt to Athlete Types:Coaches and parents should recognize that there isn't a one-size-fits-all approach. Different athletes respond to various coaching styles—some thrive with aggression, while others require external motivation or even fear-based motivation. Understanding an athlete's type helps establish a tailored plan and fosters trust. Asking an athlete what type of athlete they are is a great start, however, many won’t know or understand. They will just say whatever they think you want to hear or what their favorite athlete is. Give them options and truly listen to what they say. After establishing what type they are then use that in practice to see the results. If it doesn’t work try a different approach. Keep going until you find what gets the best results!At Peak Performance Athletics we dive into these strategies, and more, in detail to accelerate the journey toward becoming an elite athlete. Remember, sports should be enjoyable, and winning enhances the experience.If you believe your athlete could benefit from our approach, click the link below or call/text us at (726) 239-8908 for a complimentary consultation. We look forward to joining your journey to Peak Performance!